Oh I Don't Have Time To Knit...

You Are a Snarky Blogger!

You've got a razor sharp wit that bloggers are secretly scared of. And that's why they read your posts as often as they can!

What kind of blogger are you?

i meant to post the results of this quiz on friday, but then the day got away from me, and then the weekend came. 

friday night i did nothing. i just sit on my ass and knit.

saturday, i cruised around town and in my cruising, ended up in the shop of a local craft celebrity, Kathy McMannis, author of Rag Wool Appliqué: •Easy to Sew •Use Any Sewing Machine •Quilts, Home Decor & Clothing . she was very friendly and we chatted about how she started out and what it was like owning her own shop (she's had it for 3 months and has been keeping busy with custom embroidery orders for the local highschool and businesses). anyway, it was kind of cool. maybe i'll buy her book and have her sign it for me... right next door to her place, is my town's only yarn shop. i really really really want to love this little shop, have my picture up on the wall, have the owners wave to me when i drive by, come by for a sit with my Big One from dunkin donuts .... sigh... but it's not going to happen as long as OVER HALF OF THEIR INVENTORY IS THAT HEINOUS FUN FUR NOVELTY CRAP!!!! they also had a bunch of baby yarn. my guess is the bulk of their clientele answer to the name of granny or nana. i did buy 2 skeins of very pretty dark pink cascade, since i felt kind of guilty just coming in, making retching noises at the wall of fuzz yarn, and then walking out.

saturday night, j and i went across the street to the neighbors' annual holiday open house.  this is the third year for me.  the first year, we had just gotten engaged that day so i spent the evening showing off the crazy ass 6 carat cubic zirconium that j had just given me (to be traded in later -- he had wanted to surprise me, but he had also wanted me to pick out my own ring, so he decided to get me something fabulously fake).  last year i got drunk, spilled red wine on the carpet, and ended up with a mother of a hangover.  this year, i behaved myself, but came close to going postal on the nicolette sheriden of the neighborhood when she asked me to make her a fuzzy assed novelty yarn shawl like the one she was wearing.  i told her that i'd be happy to teach her how to knit one herself, to which she replied, "oh i know how to knit, i just don't have time."

i've heard other bloggers talk about this...i didn't realize how infuriating it would be to be on the receiving end of such a comment.  'yeah lady, i have so much free time myself that i'd be more than happy to knit you some fuck ugly shawl out of yarn that i can't stand on needles the size of tree trunks that hurt my hands while you prance around showing off your navel ring to my poor husband who is nice enough to help you around the house (because your ex-husband is a loser) but who is afraid to go over to your house alone because you make him "uncomfortable." '

no i did not tell her that.  i think i did say though, "if you have time to sit on your ass, you have time to knit."  was that rude?

Comments

[dmr]

Can anyone tell me where I can find Kathy McMannis Rag Wool Applique book mentioned in this blog?

[melanie]

hee hee. fuck ugly.

[Auntie M]

Sounds like a perfect response. Did she think before speaking?

[claudia]

No, not rude. But had you prefaced the comment with "You fucking lazy twit,...." now that would have been rude.

[Bron]

Not rude at all - you showed remarkable restraint.

Always nice to get another member in the "Go knit your own s**t & get outa my face" club. :::wink:::

[Cathi]

I was thinking about that this weekend- Libby and I went to the last of the Denver yarn stores, and it amazes me how many of them have half of their inventory devoted to eyelashish yarn. I guess that's what's selling these days, but it just seems weird, because I feel like it precludes a lot of them from having enough other yarn to buy for a project that takes more than two skeins. And nice comment by your neighbor...too busy slutting it up to knit.

[kim]

Heh! I'm impressed you didn't say more.

[Elisa]

I think if those were the only two things you said to her, she got off easier than she deserved. Grrr...

[Anna]

You crack me up!
So funny!!

(I agree with the Blogger quiz results.)